Indian Movie

I have to describe this plot, which just seems too odd.

I'm watching an Indian movie on the plane from Bangalore to Frankfurt.

Here's the plot summary. A girl and her best friend are visiting rural India. Girl meets a guy named Krishna. He's kind of a Fabio type. They sing, run up and down mountains, by idyllic water. Julie Andrews, eat your heart out!

The guy, in fact, looks a bit dumb and happy. There's a goofy smile, and he seems none too bright. He lives under the eye of his watchful grandmother. He also seems to run fast, jump high. They must have something special up in the mountain water.

After ten days of nothing but bliss and dancing, the girls return back to Singapore (yes, they're still Indian--but Indians live in Singapore) where they get promptly fired for taking an additional five days of vacation.

To save their job, the main female's friend says they need to convince Krishna to come to Singapore, where he'l be a star, since he can run faster, jump higher, and sing and dance longer than the average bear.

But Krishna is an innocent and they'll need a ploy to convince him to come. So the friend writes a script which says the main female's mom is going to arrange a marriage with another guy, and she needs him to come to show to her mom so she'll pick him and they can get married. And she desperately misses him too.

OK, a bit of lying, but when you need to save your job, what's a little lying?

Krishna, so happy that she cares that much, starts to plan a trip to Singapore, and wants to ask permission from Grandma.

She won't allow it.

Why not, Grandma?

OK, she explains. There was some accident involving an alien spacecraft.

Yes. Alien.

And somehow her son was made none-too-bright.

The alien (not quite ET) felt bad and gave him super powers. He's now super smart, super athletic, everything a proud Indian mama could want.

His prowess leads him to the attention of one Dr. Arya, who speaks a good deal of English, perhaps to emphasize his evil.

He is very impressed by Rajiv, who is the father of Krishna. He wants him to come to Singapore to work for him (this is about 20 years ago). He tasks him with making a machine that can tell the future. You know. Minority Report. Paycheck. That kinda thing. Krishna spends two years making this machine, and is finally successful. It uses retinal scans and his heartbeat to turn on. Retinal scans are key.

Dr. Arya then has a plan. Now that Rajiv is done, he doesn't need to live anymore. So he'll kill him. Not one to delegate, Arya will do it himself.

Except Rajiv discovers this plan by looking into the future in his machine. And he destroys his own machine before Arya arrives.

This is all being revealed by a security chief that works for Arya, but was good friends with Rajiv.

And he saves Rajiv's life! Arya still wants to kill Rajiv, since he already has the plans to make a new machine, courtesy of Rajiv. But the security chief says that he can't kill Rajiv, because his retinal scan and heartbeats turn on the machine. So Arya puts him in his dungeon or something, and he's kept out of sight.

Meanwhile, his wife pulls an Amidala of sorts, and dies when she hears her husband has died.

Meanwhile, the mother of Rajiv is all sad, because she's heard her son has died to the manipulations of an evil company and she won't have her grandson risked. He's all she has, don't you know? And she's ever so jealous.

But after this impassioned plea with aliens and a megalomaniac entrepreneur, she changes her mind. If he's truly in love, she can't stop him. Go find her.

So he promises to hide his powers so no one will know.

When he arrives, he sees this Chinese girl in a wheelchair. She is begging for money while her abled brother does martial arts tricks. But then the cane he's using to lift himself breaks, and he's hurt.

The audience, not feeling much sympathy, leave. Krishna, feeling generous, comes out with sword and does a show. This raises a charitable mood. The brother, ever grateful, says he works for the Bombay Circus. Come watch him.

So Krishna and female go watch. And there's a fire. And there's a girl trapped inside.

But he promised not to show his powers. He sees a mask, and as Phantom of the Opera man, he goes inside and rescues the girl. He has powers similar to Neo in Matrix, doing wire fu, and able to kick serious ass. Except in rescues.

The girl asks who he is. He says "Kriisshhh..." and so he goes by "Krish". Newspapers want to know. Who is this masked man? Who is Krish.

Female lead thinks that it's her boyfriend, Krishna. She hires some thugs to pretend to kidnap her, so she'll be rescued by him.

But apparently, real thugs show up, and rather than reveal he has superpowers, he pretends to get beat up. Girl is all sad. But they take the engagement ring, and so he has to go get it back.

He does more Neo action and beats up the gang to get the ring back. At that point, he takes his mask off, and guess who's there? The guy from the circus whose sister was in the wheelchair! You're Krish? You must tell the world. You'll get a huge reward.

No, I don't to tell anyone. Here, you take the mask. You be Krish. You get the reward. Pay for your sister's surgerty to make her better (right). He reluctantly agrees and becomes a star in the Singapore press.

Meanwhile, female lead discovers she had a video camera and it was aimed at the circus, and shows Krishna finding his mask, and then rescuing. So it was Krishna!

Meanwhile Krishna tries to talk to girl, but ends up talking to her mom. She has never heard of Krishna, and never went to Hong Kong (which is where the girls said she was, which was the reason they couldn't see her).

Anyhoo. Some accusations fly about how this girl lied to him and grandma was right, and he's heading back. And she's so sorry about lying to him.

That's when the security chief shows up and finds Krisha, who looks just like dad, and tells them that dad is still alive!

And this coincides with the new future telling machine being rebuilt, and thus the need to use Rajiv to start the machine.

But Krishna is there to rescue everything, kill Arya, and then bring the whole family back.

I must say there was a tear in my eye when Rajiv is reunited with mom, even if the plot was completely ridiculous.

Cobbled together from Batman, Superman, Sound of Music, Matrix, and ET, at least, it was original in very odd ways.

Ah Indian films.